Abiti Mwenye declared lawyer Justina Ngozi as the looser after only his second move of the Bawo game. He was playing against Magede Si Wandale, who was feeling somewhat overwhelmed by Justina Ngozi’s legal credentials. As a matter of fact, Professor Mpandadzina, along with Wiseone From The East, perching lazily on their Ndakhuta Ndalema’s and almost paying any attention to the game, were of the opinion that Magede was about to be given a bawo hiding. It must have been the particularly delicious Wadzana they were savouring, or they were judging a book by its cover, giving the game to Ngozi on the basis of his commendable legal credentials.

But if the two years that I have spent here at the Bawo club has taught me anything, it is that Abiti Mwenye did not become the undefeated and undisputed Bawo Champion by chance or luck in this game that is dominated by men. She had fully earned her spurs and knew a thing or two about the mystical game. It was for this reason that she was not taken in by lawyer Ngozi’s verbosity and aggressive opening. Indeed after three turns, we saw Magede Si Wandale capturing Ngozi’s Kuwo and, as they say, that was that.

As Magede si Wandale received the congratulatory patting on the back, Professor Mpandadzina offered Lawyer Ngozi a Chipanda of commiseration.

“Sorry, brother”, Professor Mpandadzina said. “I know it is not easy to be humiliated twice in one week. Here, drown yourself in this.”

Taken aback, Wiseone From the East, whose visits at the Bawo Club have become infrequent ever since Gogo Sinsamala ordered him to go chasing after a certain Forensic Audit Report that is apparently with the IMF, wanted to know what this was about.

In fact, even Lawyer Ngozi did not himself take to hear the sympathy offered by Professor Mpandadzina. Knowing exactly what the learned professor was talking about, Justina Ngozi said, “Come on, professor. You know very well that having a United States Green Card is a criminal offence and grounds for candidacy challenge!”

Professor Mpandadzina smiled at Ngozi in a friendly fashion. “Your thesis that our former president, the father and founder of the Malawi nation, the late Dr Kamuzu Banda should be stripped of all his honours and be declared was an interesting read, but it failed to convince any of your peers as suitable for publication.”

Professor Mpandadzina proceeded to explain to Wiseone From The East, as the Chief Mourner all the rest of the Bawo Club listened attentively, that this lawyer, Justina Ngozi, had written an academic paper in which he had argued that Dr Hastings Kamuzu Banda should be stripped of all the honours that Malawians had bestowed upon him. In his paper, Ngozi had contended that Kamuzu Banda should not have contested in the first elections in Malawi in 1964 because he was by then a possessor of a United States Green Card, and also had permanent residence visas for the United Kingdom and Ghana. By virtue of having these residence visas, lawyer Ngozi had argued, the Dr Banda owed allegiance to foreign countries and was unfit to run for any public office in this country. Possession of these visas was a criminal act and Dr Banda should only have been allowed to run for office 7 years after he had renounced these countries and demonstrated that he was a true Malawian.

“The editorial board of Mpatse Abwire press considered your paper to have been too political and inspired by your hatred of MCP, and your intention to stop Dr Chakwera, the new MCP flag bearer to be blocked from running for the presidency because of his previous prolonged stay in the United States. It will not be published.

“I must say that I agree with the board. Surely a man of learning such as yourself should not be at the forefront of abusing democracy by advancing arguments that are only for political expedience, Mr Ngozi. A Green Card in America is nothing but a residence visa, the possession of which should never ever be made a basis for blocking a person’s candidacy for the presidency. Henry Masauko Chipembere, Orton Chirwa and Kanyama Chiume understood this when they called Dr Banda from Ghana understood very well that this man they were calling upon to help and lead them in the struggle for independence had an American Green card and a Ghana residence Visa. It was an advantagethat he had been exposed to ways of life beyond those of Nyasaland, which could only add to his experience and life skills. Are you sure we should now begin to question the legitimacy on a person’s credentials to lead Malawi on the basis of which residence visas he possesses?”

Although many at the Bawo Club felt like celebrating Professor Mpandadzina’s words of counsel, and the fact that even Justina Ngozi had admitted that his paper had been misguided, none of this happened. Instead, we all observed a moment of silence contemplating the big deflating blow the news would have to those that had sponsored Lawyer Ngozi’s paper.

The silence was broken by the arrival on the scene of Gogo Sinsamala, who immediately announced that finally, after his joining the Bawo club, Laughter Kambala had used Gogo Sinsamala’s influence to get Rapid Team Laundry to once again start accepting his suits. The really good news was that an employee at the laundry had discovered in the inside pocket of one of Kambala’s jacket, a document that revealed how deeply involved Amai and her pet, Chingolopiyo were in the Cashgate Scandal.

Popular Nigerian Prophet T.B. Joshua has stepped up his engagement with believers via social platform Facebook in an interactive and revealing question and answer session.

Joshua, who is followed by almost 900,000 people on Facebook, answered a number of questions ranging from knowing ones destined partner in marriage to his handling of tests and trials. “Love is a thing of the heart and God is love. Your love towards a person should be not because of outward attraction but deeds,” Joshua wrote in response to a question on marriage from a Zambian fan.

“This can only happen when you are delivered and the person in question is delivered,” the cleric continued. “When you are delivered and the person in question is not delivered and you have a sort of love towards him or her, your spirit will not agree to such love until that person is delivered because you will not want to be contaminated.”

He further revealed in an answer to a question from Indonesia about how he maintained his anointing amidst the challenges and pressures of life that his covenant with God sustained him. “I have a covenant with God. I cannot ask for anything outside what is written in the covenant. What I will achieve in this world is in a book I am carrying everyday; I just have to open the pages. Outside the book is not mine.”

He encouraged believers to know that nothing outside of God’s control could happen to them if He had called them. “If you are with God in truth and faith, whatever comes as a blessing or trial will be what God allows. If you are called by God, from beginning to the end, your journey has been documented. Nothing outside your documentary will happen without God’s knowledge.” 

When asked by a Zimbabwean student his advice for the next generation from his own life experience, Joshua had this to say: “You just have to follow the principle of ‘time for everything’ – there is a time to be born and a time to grow. The young ones are under the ‘time to grow’. A time for anything to grow is a time to sacrifice. Your time, your strength, everything you have – sacrifice for God, your Creator.”

The owner of the Christian television station Emmanuel TV also explained that one could receive ‘deliverance’ in a dream without necessarily physically meeting a minister of God. “It depends on how much the Word dominates your heart before you receive such unique, awesome grace,” he emphasised.

“Whenever a man 

has cast a longing eye
on offices,
a rottenness begins in his conduct”
Thomas Jefferson

Let us first talk about Lazarus Chakwera’s aborted pilgrimage to Bingu’s ‘Taj Mahal’.

The MCP’s latter-day Moses knows he needs the South, read Lhlomwe, vote to make it to Kamuzu Palace that is why last week, during his ten-day stay in the region, he decided to exploit the spirit of that guy who shamelessly made Lhlomwe the ‘super tribe’.

But was Abusa not shooting himself in the foot by trying to visit the shrine of a guy everyone wanted out not too long ago? What is it that Bingu has done – posthumously – that is so out of the ordinary that it has absolved him of all the ‘bad’ things associated with him?

Remember his militant ‘I’ll smoke out’, ‘ndikumenyanimenyani’ and ‘I’ll meet you in the streets’ rants? I thought Abusa’s message should the antithesis of what Bingu represented?

Granted, Rev. Chakwera wants to be a statesman by embracing Malawi’s history. After all he leads a party with so chequered a history that many people grow goose bumps to imagine it back in power.

But Chakwera’s pilgrimage to Bingu’s shrine was ill-timed to say the least.

But let us talk soccer for now!

For those of you who follow soccer religiously, the English Premier League must be your preoccupation. In fact, I know friends who can recite names of players in at least five teams in the English Premier League by heart but they hardly know three names in our own Big Bullets or Mighty Wanderers.

Although supporters of the current champions, Manchester United, wear sullen faces nowadays, they at least know the Red Devils have a ‘mathematical chance’ of still turning the tables and retain the championship.

By this they mean that if Man U will win all their remaining games while, say, the Top 4 teams keep losing theirs, then the cup may still remain at Old Trafford.

That will not happen, of course, but I am bringing this up because, all things considered, the main opposition MCP also has a ‘mathematical chance’ of causing an upset come May 20.

Forget the DPP’s foray in the Centre last time we queued to vote some five years ago, the MCP are still kings in the second largest region of the country. Re-energised by new, supposedly untainted, leadership – like the phoenix of old – the oldest party in the land just might rise again.

Here is how the mathematics might work: We have four serious contenders and a few wannabes. Out of the four main contenders three are from the populous South.

Whatever matrix you may use, Joyce Banda, Peter Mutharika and Atupele Muluzi will divide among themselves the votes in the South almost in equal measure.

Let us skip the Centre and head North first. Historically the smallest region of the country has always been fickle in its voting pattern since the dawn of multiparty politics in 1994. It is the only region in the country that is politically conscious and therefore responds to emerging issues.

That is why in 2004 it voted massively for the émigré Republican Party of Gwanda Chakuamba, an old dude from the deep South, when its regional ‘god’ Chakufwa Chihana decided to consort with the UDF, the party the region accuses of ‘stealing’ the presidency from it in 1994.

The North again showed its fickleness when it massively voted for Bingu’s DPP in 2009.

But, after Bingu’s crazy ‘Mzuzu Corner’ speech and the quota system in public university selection, the North will definitely dump the DPP this time around.

Of course, notwithstanding that, the DPP may still grab a few seats in the region.

But the MCP should forget making a significant showing in the region. Look, the North still has historical issues with the MCP; remember teachers from the region were relocated back there on John Tembo’s watch?

So, despite Lazarus Chakwera’s wife, NyaGondwe, coming from Mwazisi somewhere in the hills of Rumphi, the region will not give the cleric-cum-politician enough votes with which to open the Banana Room at Kamuzu Palace.

Which leaves the Centre to decide the national outcome.

The election of Rev. Chakwera as the MCP torch-bearer in the May 20 elections brought some fresh air to a party weighed down by three decades of bad history. JZU, if truth be told, represented the MCP’s dark past. Whatever was wrong with the MCP era has his handwriting all over the place.

The ringing vote of no confidence in JZU and the equally ringing endorsement of Rev. Chakwera last August energised the MCP so much that the oldest party in the land suddenly started becoming attractive again. Just look at the parliamentary candidates that are falling over themselves to represent the party one Chihana famously branded a party of ‘death and darkness’.

It almost feels May 20 is Chakwera’s to lose…

…Not until, of course, you factor in a number of significant fundamentals.

I have demonstrated how the North abhors anything ‘black-cockish’. So not enough votes beyond Jenda for Abusa, if truth be told.

Which leaves Chakwera the South to augment his Centre vote.

But again, if truth be told, the more than a decade he was at the helm of the MCP, John Tembo did next to nothing to make the MCP be felt beyond Jenda or Tsangano Turn Off. Chakwera has less than four months to consolidate his hold on the Centre and break into the North and South.

A gargantuan feat, one would say, but not impossible.

Chakwera can steal the thunder from his three main opponents by his choice of running mate. He needs a ‘guy’ (or a ‘doll’) from either the North or Centre.

But, realistically, he should forget the North and, instead, train his eyes on the South. He needs someone who can appeal to the PMCT – Phalombe, Mulanje, Chiradzulu and Thyolo.

I can volunteer a few names…no, just one…Lovemore Munlo. The former Chief Justice has name recognition and means to make the MCP relevant in the South, I mean the PMCT region.

But will Abusa trust a guy who gave him a serious run for his money at the convention with the No. 2 spot? I am not sure. But Munlo can grab a few PMCT votes.

Chakwera must think about these things instead of wasting time visiting shrines.

In God’s word in Mat 9:29 says “Then He touched their eyes, saying, According to your faith let it be you”. All throughout the New Testament you will see a pattern in the healings of Jesus. That pattern is Jesus helping people with faith in His Word. Most of the people Jesus healed were those who had faith in Him (the Word), very few people were healed because they never believed, the majority was healed because first they heard and second they believed the Word that was being preached.

Faith is the main link between us and God’s promises and Faith is what truly pleases God. If we have faith in Word of God all our questions will be answered immediately. Today, we have a lot of problems which have been haunting us for decades. We have consulted different people with different expertise but to no avail. But with faith in God’s promises all these problems will be history.

Without faith it’s impossible to please God (Heb. 11:6), so our relationship with the Lord is dependent on it. Faith is what brings the things God has provided for us from the spiritual realm into the physical realm (Heb. 11:1). Our faith is the victory that enables us to overcome the world (1 John 5:4). Everything the Lord does for us is accessed through faith.

In Ephesians 2:8, Paul says, “For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God:” It’s God’s grace that saves us, but not His grace alone. If that were so, then everyone would be saved because God’s grace has come to all men (Tit. 2:11).

So where is your faith?

Lilongwe, January 11, 2014: Minister of Information and Civic Education, Brown Mpinganjira has said the judiciary has allocated adequate time and space to start dealing with cases connected with recent plunders of Government resources as soon as next week.

Addressing a press conference on Friday in Lilongwe, Mpinganjira said the commencement of trials does not mean the end of investigations into the plunder of public resources but that government’s determination was to ensure that public resources were respected and going towards alleviating peoples poverty and development of the country.

 “Government is doing everything possible to ensure that the Judiciary has been adequately been provided with sufficient financial support to ensure that at least seven cases are heard in the courts every week,” he said.

He also said that the Anti Corruption Bureau (ACB) would continue to restrict related bank accounts and disposal of such properties as houses, vehicles and land under investigations.

Mpinganjira also explained that the preparatory work for Comprehensive Forensic Audit covering the period 2005 to March 2013 was at an advance stage.

“The Comprehensive Audit is expected to start in February 2014 and the report is expected to be out end April 2014,” explained Mpinganjira.

He added that government would soon with support from the German Government be engaging an ICT Security Officer to be based at the Accountant General’s Department.

He also said that President Joyce Band assented to Public Bill (Declaration of Assets, Liabilities and Business interests) was now a law and that the final process for this law to take effect was its gazetting and it has since been gazetted.

He said through transparency and accountability government would continue to share the Action plan and progress reports registered in the five major areas of Action plan to improve Public Financial Management.

Government formulated Action Plan that was aimed at improving Public Financial Management following the 2013 revelation of massive fraud and theft of public resources through the Integrated Financial Management Information System (IFMIS).