Khumbo Kachali, who is still vice president of the country until a new veep is sworn in following the May 20 vote, could perhaps pass as the joker of the 2014 elections.

Why?

After being registered on the ticket of the PP to run as an MP, a week before the vote he switched his allegiance to the DPP, urging his followers (if he has any) to vote for the DPP. What happens if he wins, parliament might have the answer?

Everybody pretty knows that KK, an Mzimba political guru, was annoyed for not being picked as running mate to JB, who instead chose Sosten Gwengwe from Dedza.

 

And for KK to ask for a refund of a 30 percent cut of his salary which together with JB promised soon after getting into power following the death of Bingu as an example of sacrifice, is something else. I am told the 30 percent was worth some K5 million. KK simply showed political immaturity on his actions.

Catchy slogan award

UDF’s ‘Dzuka Malawi’ was to me the most catchy slogan of the campaign.

Confused slogan award

I did find MCP’s slogan ‘Nothing for us without us’ a bit confusing because it had no Chichewa translation. Didn’t I read it somewhere, outside Malawi? What message did it carry?

Courageous presidential candidates’ award

To me, John Chisi, Davies Katsonga, Mark Katsonga, Friday Jumbe, Helen Singh, George Nnesa, James Nyondo and Kamuzu Chibambo get the award for being the courageous presidential candidates for joining the race without much grassroots support but very confident that each would carry the day against four heavyweights Joyce Banda, Lazarus Chakwera, Peter Mutharika and Atupele  Muluzi.

My take is that the battle is between Joyce and Peter. I could be wrong if you throw in Chakwera and Atupele. Let’s wait and see!

Courageous statement on whom to vote for award

“Voting for thieves and crooked people is an insult to God and ourselves”—Catholic priest Boniface Tamani, as reported by the Daily Times of May 19.

Joke: Who can eat his/her party’s symbol?

I heard this joke in Blantyre the other day: Which symbol of the parties in the race can be eaten? Well, I picked two symbols: maize and the black cock. And you know whose symbols these belong to.

 

Brotherly feud award

Of course, Davies and mark Katsonga have been awarded the Brother Feud award, for entering the presidential race in two different parties. Davies leads the Chipani cha Pfuko (CCP) –and he insists fuko should start with a P—while Mark is president of the People’s Progressive Movement.

Many Malawians still don’t get it why the two cannot be in one party, after all brothers such as the castors of Cuba and the Mutharika of Malawi have done the same.

Of course their chances of winning are zero. Sorry, guys!

Award for changing to A

Among the presidential candidates, A was a popular word-and few others changed their names to start with thinking that they could be the first to appear on the ballot as did Bingu in 2009. Of course, Atupele became Austin Atupele Muluzi (AAM) Davies Katsonga started out with Aaron; Helen Singh chose to be known as Abusa and Peter Mutharika started using Arthur Peter Mutharika (APM) way back.

But at the end of the day, it was Joyce Banda who appears first among the candidates on the ballot paper. This time, they took the surnames in alphabetical order and Singh appeared last. Whom can you blame?

Finally, let me give a special award to every Malawian who will go out to vote on May 20. May God bless this country-and let the winner be the true winner.

 

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